Cats and Caboodle Read online

  “Gee,” Savannah said, shaking her head, “that really is odd.”

  “That’s not all. Come on,” Iris coaxed.

  Savannah laughed. “How many litter boxes do you have in here, anyway?”

  “Four,” Iris complained. “There are four more in the bathrooms. Michael said that’s the only way I’m going to keep them from peeing everywhere—bring in more litter boxes.”

  “Oh,” Savannah yelped, stepping into the first bathroom, where she saw two cats in the bathtub and one in the sink, all curled up for a nap. She pointed. “Look, another renaissance cat—a girl. Where are those interesting, elaborate costumes coming from?”

  Iris shrugged. She opened a linen closet in the hall. “Look at this, they love to make themselves comfortable in here.” She moved a stack of sheets. There are two in the back there. We never know where we’re going to find them.”

  Savannah glanced up and down the hallway. “Iris, I’m speechless. Like Michael said, ‘It’s a swarm of cats, like a lava flow.’”

  “You know what,” Iris said, slumping, “I’d laugh if I wasn’t so distressed by all this.”

  Savannah put one arm around her friend and squeezed her shoulder. “I can imagine. This has got to be a bit overwhelming. I’m sorry, Iris. I had no idea what a big problem this had become.” She scrutinized the walls and the ceiling. “Hey, have you asked Michael to see if he can figure out where they’re getting in? There has to be an answer. I can see that these cats are real—they’re living, breathing beings. They’re not a figment of anyone’s imagination, nor are they apparitions.”

  “Yes,” Iris agreed.

  “So there has to be a logical explanation for them being here, and a viable opening where they’re coming in.”

  “You’d think so,” Iris agreed. “And yes, Michael and Damon are coming over this evening to take a look around.” She made eye contact with Savannah. “Craig wondered about involving Rags, but then you said you’re not ready to send him out on another adventure, right?”

  Savannah thought for a moment. “No, I’m not. Anyway, I’m not sure he’d be much help. He’s better at leading cats astray. I don’t know if he’d reveal their secret entrance or simply just join them in their folly.”

  “Really? Or are you just saying that because you don’t want him involved?”

  Savannah thought for a minute. “Maybe. I am still raw from his last escapade. I’m not ready to chance losing him again. However, now that I’ve seen how out of control this situation is becoming, and how upset you are, I’d sure like to help. Let me think about how we might use him, okay? In the meantime, I urge you to set humane traps and turn the cats over to professionals who can evaluate them and return them to their owners or find good homes for them.”

  Iris took a deep breath. “My concern is that the stream of cats won’t stop. I need to figure out where they’re coming from and how they’re getting in. To me, that’s priority number one. If I ship off the cats that are here today, what’s to say more won’t arrive tomorrow and the next day. You see, Savannah, I have to get to the core of the situation. Otherwise, I’m at risk of losing my business. I don’t want stray cats hurting my guests. And there’s the issue of the health department. They’d close me down in a nanosecond if they knew what was going on here.”

  “I hadn’t thought of that,” Savannah said.

  “Yeah, I can’t just put a Band-Aid on the situation; I have to find a way to resolve it.”

  “I see,” Savannah said. “It really is a multi-faceted problem, isn’t it?”

  Iris nodded. “It certainly is. Well, let’s hope that someone from the Cat Alliance can offer a viable suggestion short of sending all those beautiful cats to the gas chamber.”

  Chapter Two

  “So you went to the inn today?” Michael asked over dinner that evening.

  Savannah nodded. “What a mess. I don’t know what Iris is going to do. She says there seems to be no end to the number of cats coming in, and one of her main concerns is that her cuddle cats are getting out. Well, I guess she doesn’t know if they’re getting out. She hasn’t seen them outside, but they are disappearing. She puts them to bed in the cat room at night and by morning they might be gone. When and if they return, they’re sometimes wearing a costume. She said you and Damon are going over this evening to check the structure for secret doors or false floors or something. Or did you do that on your way home?”

  “No, I’ll pick up Damon after supper.” Michael set his fork on his plate. “But I doubt we’ll find anything. As you know, I got a pretty intimate idea about the innards of that place when Iris did the big renovation a couple of years ago. I sure don’t remember seeing anything that would lead to a situation like this. I can look around again, but I don’t know what I’d be looking for—a portal to another dimension maybe?”

  Savannah studied him for a moment. “So we’re back to the concept of ghost cats, are we? I petted some of those cats today, and I can tell you they’re real.” She brightened. “Hey, did you know that Arthur and Suzette are coming for a visit? They’re staying at the inn. I wonder if Arthur will bring Koko.”

  “Gosh, maybe someone should warn him about what’s going on at the inn,” Michael said. “He won’t want that nice cat getting mixed up in all that.”

  “Hopefully the issue will be resolved by then. We’re going to discuss it Thursday at the Cat Alliance meeting. Will you be there?” Savannah asked.

  “Probably not. It’s a work day, but if I can I will. Let’s play it by ear. Say, did you get a chance to check out what Antonio and Juan have done in the yard?”

  “Not really. I saw them out there when I got home from Iris’s today. Then Colbi and I took the kids to the mall to ride the merry-go-round. Have you seen how big Rosemary’s getting? Boy, can she talk. Well, she’s almost two, you know. She has a birthday next week.”

  “Already?”

  “Yes. There will be a party.”

  Michael looked at his watch. “Say, I’d better get moving.” He shook his head. “I hope Damon and I can come up with a concrete answer to all this cat activity at the inn. But from what I’ve seen so far and what I know about that place, I’m doubtful.”

  Savannah kissed him. “Well, think positive. Maybe you’ll luck out.”

  He pulled the zipper on his jacket. “If we can’t… I mean if we don’t…” He gazed at Rags, who was sprawled half in and half out of Lexie’s dog bed.

  “What?” Savannah asked suspiciously. “Why are you looking at Rags like that?”

  “I was just thinking…”

  “No,” she interrupted. “It sounds too risky.”

  “No cats have been hurt,” he insisted.

  “You don’t know that,” she complained. “No. The pain of what happened in San Francisco is just too tender. I can’t stand the thought of losing him to some black hole.”

  He laughed. “So now who’s talking supernatural babble?”

  “Hey, you started it, and it’s beginning to make as much sense as you saying they’re coming from a lava flow.”

  “I didn’t say…” he grumped.

  “I know. Go on now and see if you can find out anything. Will Craig be there?”

  “I think he will,” Michael said. “I’m counting on it. He’s the detective, after all.”

  ◆◆◆

  Twenty minutes later Michael parked his veterinary truck in front of the Kaiser Bed-and-Breakfast Inn. “What’s the plan?” Damon asked from the passenger seat. “Do you have one?”

  Michael shook his head. “Not really. From what Iris tells me, there’s no rhyme or reason for what’s happening. It’s like a nightmare that has a mind of its own.”

  Damon looked at him. “That’s an odd way of putting it.”

  “Have you been here since this started?” Michael asked.

  “Yeah. We were here for dinner one night; Mom was pretty stressed, and we decided to come over and offer our support. We saw cats, but they didn’t seem out of control or anything. She says cats are sort of coming and going?”

  “Yes, and the number of cats is growing, which is the biggest problem.”

  “She’d like that to stop?” Damon asked.

  “Yes. She wants to go back to the four or six cats she had as cuddle cats and un-invite the rest. As it is, she’s losing her cats and gaining other cats. It’s just a big mystery that has pretty much knocked your poor mother off kilter.” Michael stepped out of the cab of the truck and took his tool belt from the back. “Let’s go see if we can find any pieces to that big puzzle, shall we?”

  “Okay.”

  “Hi, Son,” Iris said, embracing Damon. She pulled back and looked at Michael, then Damon. “Thank you both for coming.”

  “Well, Iris,” Michael said, “I’m not sure we’ll be successful.” He winced. “I’m not even sure exactly what we’re looking for.”

  “Well, come in and let’s see where the mystery takes you,” Iris suggested.

  Michael started laughing. “What’s this?” he asked, gesturing.

  “What?” she asked.

  “All those wads of cloth stuffed in the walls.”

  Damon examined one of them and joked, “Keeping the cold air out?”

  “And the cats,” Iris insisted.

  “How’s that working for you, Mom?” Damon asked.

  Iris sulked.

  “Well, there they are,” Craig said entering the lobby. He shook hands with both men. “So where do you want to begin this witch hunt?”

  “Don’t say that,” Iris carped.

  “What?” Craig asked.

  “Witch hunt.”

  “Why?” Damon asked. “Are you afraid this is a paranormal event? Hey, maybe the heavens have opened up and all the cats that ha
ve crossed over the rainbow bridge are coming back.”

  Iris shook her head in disgust.

  “Guys,” Craig said, “from what I gather the cats seem to appear most often upstairs somewhere near the cat room, right, babe?”

  Iris nodded.

  Suddenly they heard a shrill screech.

  “What the…?” Craig said, turning quickly toward the sound.

  Damon and Michael looked at each other and the two of them followed both Craig and Iris through the swinging door into the kitchen.

  “Good lord,” Michael said under his breath.

  “What happened?” Iris shouted. “Ruth, are you okay?”

  “I think so, the inn manager said, struggling to sit up. “A new cat!” she exclaimed, pointing. “It jumped out of the closet and startled me.”

  “The closet?” Craig repeated.

  Ruth pointed. “Where the food’s kept.”

  “The pantry,” Iris corrected. “Yes, we have a lot of trouble with them in the pantry lately. We’ve put all the dry foods in containers and still we find cats in there.”

  “Where is the cat?” Michael asked. “The one that scared you?”

  “I think it ran back inside there when I screamed.” She started to stand up.

  “Are you sure you’re all right?” Iris asked, taking one of Ruth’s arms to help her up.

  Ruth nodded. “I fell backward and landed on my fanny.” When Michael offered a hand, she took it and stood up. “I’m all right.” She opened the pantry door in search of the cat. “It was striped like a tiger.”

  The others moved closer to the pantry door and peered inside. Michael squatted, moving things around and trying to get a good look at the lower shelves. “I don’t see a cat.” He pushed against the walls, ceiling, and floor inside the pantry, then backed out. “Well, I don’t see a cat in here. Are you sure he didn’t run outside?”

  “I don’t know,” Ruth said.

  Meanwhile Rupert walked in from their quarters off the kitchen. “What happened?”

  “A cat frightened Ruth and she fell,” Iris explained.

  “Are you okay, Ruth?” he asked, concerned.

  “I’m fine,” she said.

  Rupert glanced around. “Where’s the cat?”

  Iris shrugged. “It disappeared.”

  Michael also looked around, then suggested, “Well, Iris, let’s go upstairs where you’ve seen the most action, shall we?”

  “Let’s go,” Damon agreed.

  After Iris pointed out the areas where she’d seen unusual cat activity, she excused herself and the men began their investigation. Thirty minutes later, she met them at the bottom of the staircase.

  “Did you spill something?” Damon asked when he saw his mother wiping the floor with a rag.

  “Another vase bit the dust,” she complained.

  “What happened, Mom? Did our pounding cause repercussions down here?”

  “No,” Iris lamented. “I’m pretty sure a cat got frisky with the fresh flowers I’d arranged, and knocked them over. Damn cats!” she spewed. She asked the men, “So, what did you find? Please tell me you found something.”

  Michael shook his head. “I’m afraid not, Iris. But we only examined the room where you said you see the most activity, the linen closet, and the bathrooms up there. Couldn’t find anything out of the ordinary. No chutes or removable panels or missing tiles or holes anywhere.” When he saw Iris’s shoulders droop, he said, “Hey, we’ll come back to inspect the rest of the upstairs area later in the week. Is that okay?”

  “Yes,” Iris said. “Please do.”

  “In the meantime, just keep a close eye on the comings and goings of the cats. Maybe they’ll leave a clue. You’re attending the Alliance meeting Thursday, aren’t you?” Michael asked.

  She nodded.

  “Surely someone will have a solution, or at least some idea as to what’s going on.”

  “Michael,” Craig said, joining them, “let me ask you, have any of your clients come into the clinic with stories like this?”

  Michael thinned his lips and shook his head. “Can’t say as they have. Sure, feral cats are known to take over both commercial and private property. Cats have wormed their way into homes. That happens all the time around here, just never to this magnitude. It’s generally one cat at a time or maybe a mother cat and kittens, but never anything like this.” Michael squeezed Iris’s shoulder. “Don’t you worry; we’ll get to the bottom of it. There has to be an explanation, and I think we’re all eager to find out what it is.”

  Iris nodded and leaned against Craig for support.

  He put his arm around his wife and called after the two men as they left, “Thanks guys.”

  “You’re welcome,” Damon said.

  Michael gave a casual wave.

  ◆◆◆

  After welcoming the six board members who were present and taking care of a few points of business, Janice Fischer, president of the Hammond Cat Alliance, asked, “So, Iris, you say you have a steady stream of cats coming into your yard and you don’t know where they’re coming from?”

  “Not in the yard,” Iris said, “inside the inn. I think most of you know I run the Kaiser Inn. Well, all these cats are showing up inside the guest rooms, the pantry, the linen closets, and the bathrooms.”

  Margaret leaned forward, her brow creased. “How many cats are we talking about?”

  “It’s hard to say,” Iris admitted. “We don’t ever see them all together and my cuddle cats disappear sometimes, so we lose some and we gain some. But I’d say we’ve seen maybe a dozen new cats at one time or another these past few weeks.”

  “Holy cow!” Margaret exclaimed. “Do you have a trail of anchovies leading from a feral cat colony to your front door?”

  “I don’t think so,” Iris said, “and the cats don’t seem feral. They’re pretty calm and—get this—sometimes they come wearing clothes.”

  Savannah raised her eyebrows. “I saw two dressed like renaissance kitties—you know, in velvet with lace and gold cord.”

  “Say, what?” long-time member, Betty Gilbert squawked.

  Iris nodded. “And my cuddle cats sometimes come back wearing fancy collars or bowties.”

  “Well, obviously someone’s on the other end of this mystery,” Margaret said.

  “You think so, Maggie?” Iris asked wide-eyed.

  “Well, yeah. Cats aren’t going to dress themselves,” Margaret insisted.

  “But who and why?” Iris begged.

  When no one spoke, Betty asked, “So what sort of assistance do you need, Iris?”

  “Oh…um, well, I guess the first thing I need is to know where the cats are coming from and how they’re getting into the building. I just have to put a stop to this. I want to get all of my cuddle cats back where they belong and find a way to keep the others from coming in and disrupting my life.” She glanced around the room. “I brought it up here in case any of you have heard of something like this going on anywhere else in or around Hammond.”

  “Have you checked for chips?” Nola asked. “That’s one of the first things we do when we get a new cat in at the cat ranch.”

  “Good question,” Margaret said.

  Iris nodded. “I had Michael check the health of a few cats and he scanned them for chips. Didn’t find any. I should have the rest of them looked at. Only thing is,” Iris said, “I never know which cats are going to be there and when. Know what I mean? They’re elusive. They’re there one minute and gone the next. But yeah, if I could find out who any of them belong to, that might be useful.”

  “Absolutely,” Margaret agreed. “Do you want to trap them?”

  Iris glanced at Savannah, then a couple of other members. “I don’t know. I kind of think I don’t, if there’s any way around it, although I do want them off my property. I guess mainly I want them out of the inn. They’re too intrusive. And there’s the issue of my cuddle cats going missing, not to mention that the health department could yank my license.”

  “So the visiting cats are leading the resident cats astray?” Colbi asked.

  “I think so,” Iris said. “Or they’re showing them the way out. I want my cats inside and the others outside.”

  Janice nodded. “Sounds simple enough.”

  “Yeah, in theory,” Savannah said, “but there’s more.” When the others seemed to be waiting, she added, “The cats have a secret entry into the inn and so far we haven’t been able to find it. I think that’s Iris’s main concern.”